God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Randomize
