I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
