A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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