it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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