Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
