I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
how drunk are you?
Several
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
