i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
