on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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