i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
