I want to make a zoo with you.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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