Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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