That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
