Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
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