ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
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