dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
