This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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