We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
We are all done wearing pants today
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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