apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
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