Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
