yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
