Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize
