Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
