Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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