i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
