Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
