She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
