i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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