yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
