i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Terrible idea I love it
Randomize
