Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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