Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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