how can u be prego again
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
