uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Your penis caused this!
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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