my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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