just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
The air was thick with penises
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Randomize
