id be glad to
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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