She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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