one two three fourrrrnication!
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
