oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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