Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
