OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
You took a bar mat shot.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
