I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize
