Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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