Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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