therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize
