Dual....:-)
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize