what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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