you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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