How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
