My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Randomize
